As all our kids go back to their fall routines, a mom's life gets complicated. My routine is a combination of my four children's calendars loaded on my shoulders. The final result is always a modernist work of art. In other words — messy, confusing to those who view it, and something other moms know is a thing of beauty. I've chased down the right club teams for my kids, the right voice and piano teachers, a tutor to get ready for standardized tests, and more. I'm fighting the good fight about electronic usage and dress code. In short, I'm riding the wave of peak chaos that unfolds with every school year.
This is why I'm vulnerable right now. I've done all I can to get a good schedule in place for my kids, and, for better or worse, it's done. Now my challenge is to get the kids to own it and stay on it.
Other moms could help me out by observing a few ground rules that are in line with my proposal for a mom's code (a bro code for moms).
- People over sweaters and shopping bags. At the school events, if we could hold ‘saving seats' to a minimum, things would go a lot more smoothly. I don't think there are any sweater rights groups that would protest this bold new move. And please don't bring tripods to every event to tape your child.
- If you put it out there, you have to share. When my kids were little and had play dates, I would tell them, “If there are a few special things you don't want anyone else to play with, we can leave them in the closet. Everything else gets shared.” Moms, please don't brag excessively about your super awesome, wonderful, and up-until-now secret schedule. I can't change mine and I was perfectly happy with it until I heard you skype into a class with a coach and you are not sharing the contact. If you talk about it, you should share.
- No measures please. It would really help if the back-to-school night classrooms did not contain reading stars and leveled multiplication charts. But it often happens that the work in the classrooms represents the kids accomplishments. I wish we could stick with art. I can handle this; if my child is not the best artist, I'm okay and can even crack a joke. But with academics, my eyes drift over and I start to compare. I admit it. I can't help myself.
We all have complex fall schedules. I can agree to these few small changes.